After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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