Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
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