so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Randomize
