how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
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