You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Randomize
