her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Randomize
