Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
Randomize
