I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Randomize
