Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
