I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
