And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
