By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
