i was born a porn star she said
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
i am craving dick and cupcakes
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
