I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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