She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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