I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize