wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
