it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
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