she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Randomize
