ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
In other news, I just burned my penis
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Randomize
