idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
did i just pee glitter
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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