hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
