Those balls look pretty dangerous.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Randomize
