Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
