we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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