when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Enjoy the penises
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
