I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
What happened to your back?
Rug burn. My ass is even worse.
Randomize
