somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
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