we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Randomize
