grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
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