my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Randomize