dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
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