sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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