Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
