Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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