at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
