I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Randomize
