So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
