Heybabeimwearingurpanties
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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