At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Randomize
