at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Ladies don't puke and tell
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize