so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
