I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
