You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Randomize