I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
