I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Houston, we have a squirter
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
Randomize
