Define "chronic" masturbator.
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
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