what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
