I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Randomize
