My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Randomize